Higgs, Burger, KA and I gchatted during the inauguration. Enjoy:
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HIGGS: imagine if barack just took off in the other direction
"FUCK IT!!" (takes off in a full sprint)
TML: before he walks out, i imagine him lying on the ground ala rod tidwell
"no no, wait, just let me enjoy this for one minute"
HIGGS: he's saving that for the walk back to the white house
KA: somebody give rick warren the hook
HIGGS: rick warren really went down hill since home improvement ended
TML: ARETHA!
HIGGS: cheney is melting.
TML: i had no idea there was a second verse
KA: this is news to me
HIGGS: Red, don't you have this hat that aretha is wearing?
TML: i do. i lent it to her. i feel like im not getting it back though
KA: here we go, SMILIN' JOE
TML: $20 he points at someone after he's done with the oath
HIGGS: look at cheney...he starts to fade like marty mcfly at the end of BTTF
TML: He is Old Man Potter
BURGER: why is joe buck not calling this?
KA: john williams, unexpected
TML: i bet he wins an oscar for this
KA: and tae diggs on the clarinet?
HIGGS: barack's wikipedia page is updated already. they're jumping the gun. those bastards.
TML: no, he becomes president at noon regardless, oath or no oath, according to brian williams...who is always right
HIGGS: welcome to the new america. i just did a standing o in my apt all by myself.
BURGER: higgs just jerked off into a sock
HIGGS: wait. his middle name is HUSSEIN!! I WANT MY VOTE BACK!!
TML: man he is a stringbean
HIGGS: I wonder if Martin Luther King Jr. dreamed that the first black president would be a half-white Hawaiian metrosexual.
TML: He did, they found a text from 1960 in which he exactly prosthelytized this
BURGER: He also predicted aliens to arrive on earth in 2012 and destoy the planet
TML: At the end of his speech: "Oh and by the way, the BCS is toast"
KA: i cannot believe this man doing the benediction is a real person
TML: this guy is like a Disney-ized personificationan of an old hounddog
HIGGS: seriously. i think he's 200 years old.
TML: he did the benediction for lincoln, thats why barack wanted him
BURGER: AMEN
HIGGS: why is feinstein the MC of this whole shindig?
TML: because shes a handsome woman
HIGGS: that's one of my favorite euphemisms.
TML: its so backhanded
HIGGS: very snide.
TML: bush seems VERY happy
HIGGS: he can't wait to get the shit outta there. i'm surprised he didn't tunnel out last night.
TML: and throw up a big "PEACE, WE OUTTA HERE" sign and bolt back to texas
HIGGS: imagine if bush did 'pressed ham' as marine 1 was taking off.
TML: jesus. now all these people have to get out of the mall.
HIGGS: Taxi!